Yes. Would someone be so kind as do just kill me, please? Fast.
Stab me. Hang me. Drown me. Shoot me. Strangle me. Whatever, just make it fast.
I could barely stand what had happened today.
First, we were doing a site walk through to make changes if needed and required. At a certain point, we need to know the capacity of a place so we asked Mr P to provide us with it.
'I was not told (favourite phrase number 1) this area has to be surveyed for an estimated capacity,' so he said. 'In this case ah (favourite phrase number 2), you guys should have told me earlier (which we did before the dinosaurs were even born).'
He continued, 'You mean you guys do Events and Attractions don't know how to estimate capacity one meh? I was from Attractions last time also what.'
All right! Way to go Mr P! No faster way to get all of us fumed up like a volcano, especially when that was supposed to be his job. Of course, none of us said anything. His manager, a nice chap, just took up the task and provided us with the estimated on the spot, within 10 minutes.
Second, during the walk through, we found out that another department was halfway through placing decorations where we were supposed to have queue lines. Wonderful! I'd never seen such marvellous communication before, especially when our plan was confirmed for at least 3 weeks ago and goodness know how long their plan to place decorations there had been.
Mind you, this is not only happening between these two departments. It's so prevalent I'm surprised this world-class resort island wannabe actually gets anything done.
Third, my manager asked me to do a Powerpoint presentation for her, providing me with some pictures to insert. In the evening, she came over to my seat, pulling a bench with her, wanting to see how the presentation runs.
That ended up being a more than 2 hours revision with her dictating by my side. She wasn't happy with the photos inserted, indicating she wanted happy pictures. Then she directed me to a file in the shared drive with more photos.
I smacked my forehead and pretended I was trying to slap a mosquito. I couldn't believe it. If there were more pictures and what she wanted was inside, she could have just told me earlier.
There she was, sitting by my side poking at my computer's LCD screen selecting pictures to see. Like as if poking at the pictures would make them look nicer. If that had been the case, I would have asked her to poke at my face long ago.
In addition to selecting the pictures like choosing for a fresh fish in the market, and leaving poke marks all over invariably, she also wanted me to create 'powerful, fast and exciting effects'. So for each picture inserted, I went through another round of buying fruits and fish at the market.
By the end of an hour plus, I was almost vomiting blood with the fury of a fire hydrant at full blast. My eyes couldn't stop themselves from tumbling into the sockets with every direction she gave and I was sighing like there's no tomorrow.
Yes, by now you should know she's a Powerpoint idiot. And you should also know she's either blind and deaf, or just couldn't take hints.
Finally, when my eyes got cramps from too much tumbling and I ran out of breathe to sigh, I told her off.
Well, actually I told her I needed to go off to the ferry terminal to do an important set up. I informed her there were other urgent things that needed my immediate attention as well, or my head will roll, since her presentation wouldn't be till Wednesday.
It took two consecutive attempts to drill these messages through her waxed filled ears and 5 minutes before her upstair circuits connected and let me off.
I was amazed I'd survived so long in this department, but I dread to think of the times ahead.
So, anyone so kind as to give me a few stabs or bullets? No? Damn, you guys are such sadists.
Guess I'll have to keep on nourishing my computer with my blood.