Cylee Thoughts

Remnants from a mentally confused mind

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Thinner

There is a novel by Stephen King titled Thinner. It's about this supersize fellow who offended a Native American and gena cursed. This curse works much better than any slimming centres (and best of all, it's FREE!) because this fellow who had trouble turning the driving wheel because his belly is in the way became extremely thin and gaunt within weeks.

Well, a colleague commented today that I look slimmer. It's not the first time that I've heard such remarks in the past two months. He's not the first colleague to tell me that either.

Several friends have told me the same thing whenever I met them. However, it's one thing to hear it from your friends and another to hear it from your colleagues. After all, I only meet my friends once every few weeks. Some, once every few months or even years.

Colleagues are different. I meet them almost every day, so even if I've grown one more strand of hair or have one more blackhead, they'll most probably notice it. Hence, when they say I've slimmed down, it's something I must definitely take note of.

AHHH! I'm not cursed, am I?

Nevertheless, I tend to believe my eyes more than the words of others. I took a look at myself in the mirror and went, 'Hey, what change is there?'

Just to be absolutely sure, I went on to take my weight. No change. Even a speck of dust is heavier than any weight loss. I went on the measure my waist. No change. I even wanted to go to the extent of measuring my waist with a vernier calliper in case the change is minute. Of course, I couldn't find a vernier calliper big enough to fit my waist in the first place.

Darn. I wanted to believe my friends and colleagues but facts seem to point the other way. Maybe while my weight and waistline have remained the same, my fats have been converted to muscles thus giving me a slimmer look?

Wrong again. I still look like I'm five months pregnant and even now my chest and belly shake like a jelly mountain when I laugh. I lifted up my arms and I don't see any koala-sleeping-on-the-branch muscles. Instead, there are only dead-rat-hanging-under-the-branch muscles - limp and wobbly.

Perhaps I was right with my answer to them all along. That gravity is at work, pulling all the fats from my face down to my body. That's why I look slimmer (base on face alone). Double darn. I hate gravity.

posted by Cylee at 7:46 pm I